Thursday was my surgery. I am glad it is all over. It seemed like a long morning for me. Surgery wasn't scheduled until 1pm so I had to wait all morning. I got up with my little one and he climbed in bed with me. We put on his favorite show, Calliou and cuddled watching it together in the darkness. I got him dressed and fed him breakfast just like every other morning. My husband I and dropped him off at school and it was so hard. I just hugged him tightly and tears rolled down my cheeks as I said goodbye. I felt so sad leaving him knowing I was going for surgery. He was so happy to see his friends and think about his sleepover for later that night that he didn't even notice I was crying. I watched him walk into the classroom and slowly turned and walked to the car.
My husband and I started the hour plus ride to the hospital. I put on some relaxing, Zen, harmony music on my ipod the whole way there. It did wonders to keep me calm and tear free. I can't believe what a difference the music made in my mood. Once we got to the hospital, I kept the music playing until my surgery. We were there for over 2 hours before surgery was to begin so the waiting was hard.
Before I knew it, I was prepped and ready for surgery. Saying good bye to my husband was hard. We both cried. Then I walked to the OR with the staff. It was hard to see my husband wipe tears from his face. I have only seen him cry 3 times before (when my dog died, when my son was born and when I told him I had cancer). I know he felt so helpless and there was he could do.
I remember getting into the OR and climbing up on the table. Everyone was ready for me. It was time.
The next thing I remember was waking up and people talking to me. It was about five hours later and I was out of it. I remember my husband and friend coming in and talking to me. I was so tired. I don't really remember pain, I just felt out of it. I just wanted to sleep. I do remember having a Popsicle somewhere in there, but nothing else.
The rest of the evening was a bit rough as I was so nauseated. I could not keep much food down and I started throwing up. They kept giving me more medication for nausea and a pain pump to control the pain. It was a long night with little sleep, but once I was no longer nauseous, I felt so much better. I was able to have food and get up to go to the bathroom finally. The pain was there, but not as bad as I thought.
I got home a few hours ago and am resting comfortably in my bed with my best girlfriend here to take care of me for a few days. I was welcomed by gorgeous flowers from my husband, a cookie bouquet, gift baskets and more. It was like Christmas when I got home. The only thing missing is my son. He is still at his sleepover having a good time which allows me some time to rest and catch my breath.
I got through surgery OK. I am glad it is over with. What a relief. I hope the pathology doesn't reveal anything else bad. I will pray for that as I get some rest.
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